For my first post into 5 Fandom Friday I wanted to showcase things that technically don’t exist and can’t really be duplicated unlike, say, Butterbeer (mmm Butterbeer). These are my top 5 food and drinks that I wish existed so I could stock my pantry and perhaps rule the world. Perhaps.

Ambrosia

Look, if it’s good enough for the Gods its good enough for me. I’m just saying that with all the slaughtering and offerings that went on to present gifts to the Gods, the Gods still preferred Ambrosia. I mean have you ever had free steak? Free steak is delicious man. Ambrosia must’ve been some amazing stuff.

Faelnirv

Many non-existent beverages take the place of alcohol in stories. Some are pretty obvious, such as Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy‘s Ol’ JanxSpirit and the Romulan Ale below. Faelnirv, from the Eragon series, is by far my favorite, though, because it seems the least disgusting tasting and is the most poetic. Made from distilled elderberries and spun moonbeams, it just sounds enchanting doesn’t it? It’ll also completely knock you off your rocker and make time speed up! Just kidding, you were high and blacked out.

Romulan Ale

kirkslappinghimself

There are a LOT of blue drinks in the Star Trek universe. I mean.. a lot. Was that just the easiest color to show on-screen?? Romulan Ale, perhaps, is the best known blue drink. It was strong, sometimes used as medicine, and for a while illegal to own. Sounds like Romulan moonshine to me! It was even known to muddle the brain of Klingons if they drank it. I wish this existed mainly because it seems so forbidden and wrong and if Romulan moonshine is wrong I don’t want to be right.

Honey-Cake

Many drinks and food were created to give the adventurer strength or fortitude in books and movies. The series that, by far, made the most energy giving edibles is the Lord of the Rings. Men made Cram which was more a lesson in chewing, according to its description, than anything else. Elves created Lembas bread which is widely known. While it provided amazing sustenance and lasted forever, even the Hobbits stated it was nothing compared to Honey-Cake. Honey-Cake was a twice baked cake that gave the eater energy made by Beorn. The only negative was that Honey-Cake made the eater thirsty. Leave it to the Hobbits to love a food that could make you energized all day and required a drink to go along beside it! I wouldn’t mind eating this in the morning instead of oatmeal or swap it, with water, in a pinch for a 5 hour energy drink. Although, if I did so routinely I’d probably be as porky as a hobbit.

Three Course Dinner Chewing Gum

Last, but not least is Willy Wonka’s brilliant Three Course Dinner chewing gum. Besides how extremely convenient this would be, think of the flavors! I barely have time to cook a 2 course dinner, let alone 3. I sure as heck don’t have time to eat one every night. If I could pop in some gum, chew for about an hour, and go to bed satisfied and my palate delighted I would be over the moon. Caesar salad, grilled cheese with tomato basil soup and vanilla ice cream to end! Of course I would make sure the desert portion was quite worked out before investing in it but I have much faith in the Wonka company’s new management.

Obviously, I have to go eat now.

eatingawkwardly

2 Responses

  1. I was JUST talking about that chewing gum with my Mum last night!! We really want that to come to fruition! What an awesomely nerd and creative take on the list! I LOVE IT!! xx

    1. Thank you! It was a lot of fun to write.

      Man, if someone could make a chewing gum that would substitute just the main course they’d be instant billionaires.

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